A little bit closer...

We have a court date!

November 1, 2010.

That is the day we stop being "legal guardians" and start being "parents." That is the day we order our birth certificate, our social security card, etc. That is the day the label "family" becomes recognized by more than just those who know us.

We are already parents and family, but it will be nice to have it set in stone.

Irrevocable.

I like that word.

A nifty thing about the finalization date: It is exactly one week before my birthday. That means Meerkat was born right around Daddy's birthday, and her adoption will have been finalized right around Mommy's birthday. Julys and Novembers are going to be filled with celebration in this household!

:)

SIMILAC!!!!!! ACK!

So today I found out that Similac is recalling a bunch of formula. Guess what brand of formula we use. DING DING DING! You got it.

I decided to check the container that we just finished last night to see if it was affected in the recall. It was. The entire 1.45 lb container was contaminated with Beetles and Beetle parts. Did you read that?

BEETLE PARTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Do you know what is included in the term "beetle parts?" LARVAE! Little tiny slimy beetle eggs.

In my daughter's stomach.

I had noticed two little black specks in one of her bottles recently, and I thought it was the dishwasher's fault, so I dumped it and made a new one. Now, I don't know if it was the dishwasher or Beetle parts.

I am horrified. HORRIFIED. I can't think straight right now. Who knows how many containers of formula she's eaten that have been contaminated. Over the past couple weeks, she's started to spit up more often, and she doesn't eat quite as much or with as much gusto as she once did. I assumed it was just natural baby tummy growth/sensitivity changes. Then I read the article that states gastrointestinal problems as a result of the contamination.

So it's official - She has ingested some unknown amount of Beetle and/or Beetle parts and/or Beetle larvae.

As an adoptive mother, who was unable to exclusively breastfeed her daughter, I am so angry. I trust these companies to provide my baby, who depends on formula as her only source of nutrition, a healthy, safe alternative to breastmilk. It's my only option. It's unfair that I now have to be worried about my daughter's safety and well-being because of something that I've mixed up and put in her body.

On top of all that, we don't get WIC or any sort of assistance to pay for our formula. We go through formula very quickly, and that means we're buying a lot of formula. And at approximately 23 dollars a container --- that's a lot of money. And now, I have to live with the fact that I've spent my own money to buy something that has made my daughter sick and that could make her sicker for all I know. All because someone slacked off in quality control.

What makes me angry is the timing. Couldn't they have caught this sooner, or notified us sooner? Our container is completely empty. How could they not have known this sooner? How could they not have let us know sooner?

I am seriously considering switching to Nestle or Enfamil. I worry that the switch could mess with her system... but really, could it cause her any more gastrointestinal distress than swallowing Beetle parts?

I am so upset right now. :(

Two Month Stats

Weight: 12lbs 9oz
Length: 23 inches
Head Circumfrence: 15 inches

Two Months!

Dear Meerkat,
Wow! Time is flying by. I can't believe you're two months old already. Two months ago today, mommy was drugged up on A.lka Se.ltzer Plus and nose spray in order to meet you for the first time. I was so sick I could barely walk, but I wasn't going to miss your grand entrance, even if I had to be carried in to see you. And today, on your two month birthday, mommy is sick again. A.lka Se.ltzer is coursing through my veins as I type this. Let's hope this isn't a trend and that I'm sick every two months on your birthday. :p

Where do I begin to talk about this last month... Parts of it have been extremely rough, and other parts have been pure Heaven. Since your one month birthday, your fussiness increased tenfold. For a couple weeks there, there was no calming you down. Nothing worked. The worst night was Wednesday, September 1st. Daddy had to go to work, and it was just me and you at home alone. I was excited to spend some quality mommy-baby time, but you had other plans. About 15 minutes after daddy left, you started screaming. I don't mean loud cries. I mean blood curdling, lose your voice screams. Eventually you started doing this really weird scream that sounded a bit like hyperventilation. I couldn't calm you down. I tried singing, rocking, your swing, swaddling, unswaddling, pacifier, bottle, diaper change, walking, bouncing, talking, TV... etc. etc. Nothing would work. You spit up about 8 times that day, so we think your little tummy was hurting, but you didn't have a fever and didn't seem sick otherwise. You screamed for about 3.5 hours. By the end of the night, mommy was crying with you. I just decided we'd sit together and do nothing, and we just cried and cried together, until you finally fell asleep. And then you slept for HOURS!

Since that night, your fussiness has begun to wear off. Instead, we are now blessed with more happy baby time. You still don't smile much; we're lucky to see one authentic smile a day. But, you will coo and squeal when you're pleased. You got a new playmat, and you love it! You will stare up at the monkey and lion and coo and coo. You completely ignore the tiger and get really upset if you snag your hand on his dangly red heart.



Now we're just waiting for the giggles to start. I can't wait to hear your laughter.

You tolerate bathtime much better now! But, you still prefer a shower. You also tolerate getting dressed and diaper changes much better than you used to. You'll sometimes even coo while we're changing you.

Your sleep routine is very good at night. You sleep from around 12:30am until 5:30 or 6:00am just about every night. Sometimes we get lucky and you sleep until 7. That's rare though. If we swaddle you tight, you'll sleep from 8pm until your midnight feeding, and then you'll go back to sleep afterward.

Your eyes are still blue, though they are starting to darken just a bit. And, you have one little brown spot in your right eye. Speaking of your eyes... they're huge! You have the most beautiful, big eyes in the world. And your eyelashes are so long and luxurious. You could do mascara commercials. :) People keep commenting that you resemble Daddy. It's interesting, because in some ways you do. I see it right around your eyes. It's amazing how that ends up working out.



Meerkat, you've brought this house so much joy! We're so happy that you're here. It's still unreal to look down at you all curled up in my arms, clutching my chest. I'm so thankful for you.

Love,
Mommy

A first mother's perspective...

I'm a big nerd who is in love with adoption. I am so eager to find other couples who are using our agency, or who have used the agency, or who are just adopting in general. So, every month or so, I do a google search for blogs. This time, I ran across an interesting blog written by a first mother, who has used ANLC not once, but twice. Her story is touching, and it's nice to see a first mother's perspective of our agency that is a good one.

Her blog is here: Baby, Ho!

The thing that struck me first about this blog is her discussion of the photos of potential adoptive couples. It's something that has bothered me about our agency from the moment we had to redo our profile pictures. She says she felt that they were too staged, that the people looked like they were posing, or smiling awkwardly. And, I agree. The problem is, after sending in 85 pictures that are natural, happy moments and sincere smiles and then being told that they all need to be done over again because "there was glare in your glasses" or "you aren't close enough to each other" or "don't cover your eyes" or "you have to look directly at the camera" or "they have to be taken within the last year ONLY" it's hard to smile sincerely. And, the pictures are posed! I hated that aspect of our profiles. We tried to get the most sincere pictures we could. We didn't want to look like a plastic couple. But, it's nice to see that a first mother feels the same way, since all that time we were told "first mothers want to see this... and this... and this... specifically."

Anyway, I love our agency! Love them! Plan to use them again, in fact! So, that's just a minor setback, and something that I can live with. The point of this blog is simply to point you in Kami's direction. Comments are off on her blog because she's gotten some negative feedback. I'm hoping she'll stumble over here at some point to see there are people in her corner. Granted, I'm a bit biased in the whole "pro adoption" campaign... but I truly think it's a beautiful thing.

Wordless Wednesday -- Wildcat edition